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Adult Children - exploring the phenomena of emotional maturity in an unforgiving world


Public description

"Adult Children" of Alcoholics (or ACOA) refers to those raised by alcoholic or otherwise dysfunctional caregivers.

Adult Children in recovery strive to go from relying on reactions learned in childhood to forming new habits suited to adult life. Recovery is an ongoing process with many paths and detours and side trips. Recovering from childhood issues can be a lifetime endeavor, but healing IS possible.

This is not an ask reddit or advice reddit. This is a recovery community.#### Description "Adult Children" (or ACOA) refers to people who were raised by alcoholic or otherwise dysfunctional caregivers.

Some traits that Adult Children share are:

  • overdeveloped sense of responsibility
  • approval seeking
  • conflict avoidant
  • difficulty with intimacy
  • feel fundamentally different from "normal" people
  • may have issues with self esteem, shame, boundaries, abandonment, or authority figures

Some positive effects of a dysfunctional childhood are:

  • highly developed self reliance
  • ability to sense the mood of a room or person
  • increased empathy and compassion
  • awareness of abuse dynamics and tactics

Adult Children in recovery strive to go from an emotional child in an adult's body to an adult with a child-like side. Recovery is an ongoing process with many paths and detours and side trips. Recovering from childhood issues can be a lifetime endevour, but healing IS possible.

Recovery resources:

The Traditions: https://adultchildren.org/literature/traditions/

While the focus of this site is personality disorders, much of the information is relevant to Adult Children: http://outofthefog.net/CommonNonBehaviors/Fleas.html

This is an old and very trusted email group at Yahoo groups. Email aca-acoa-subscribe@yahoogroups.com to be added to the weekly mailing list. You can stay anonymous.

If you are interested in attending 12-Step meetings, here is the ACOA live meeting locator: http://allone.org/ You do not have to "share" at the meetings or speak unless you want to.

Find a therapist: www.GoodTherapy.org Consider a therapist who has experience and training with trauma issues. EMDR therapy has been proven to help PTSD symptoms.

Other relevant subs:

InternetParents - Ask the internet about things your parents never taught you.

AlAnon

RaisedByNarcissists

AbuseInterrupted

SuicideWatch

ParentlessByChoice

The most common phrases the members use:

little brother
feel like
higher power
away from
even though

Similar subreddits:

Website